Most times we don’t want to be lied to no matter how bad something is, we prefer to be told the truth. It’s even worse when someone lies to you and you know the truth
When someone lies to you, you feel quite betrayed and not worth considering we would all want to be told the truth other than being played around
On the other hand in some instances sometimes it’s better never to know the truth considering not knowing would be a better option basing on how we would react after knowing or how or it would impact us after knowing
Lying has little if any or nothing to do with gender, race, age or most ways you may stereotype it and in short people mostly lie due to selfishness
So we look at the possible reasons why some people lie, how to tell if someone is lying to you;
1. People lie because they have done something wrong or bad
This is a lot straight forward, and it’s in such instances that we would prefer someone to tell us the truth no matter what because soon or later the truth would come back to haunt us.
If I give someone my car and he knocks a person, anyone would very much prefer to be told the truth and not to be lied to that it was just a speeding ticket only find out from the police that the day they were given the car is when the car is reported to have knocked a person dead
This also shows that humans are designed to naturally tell the difference between good and bad and not necessarily have to be told the difference through religion as claimed in most instances.
If you found a kid with sugar around the lips and asked them if they are licking sugar.
The kid might lie to you and say no even if you have never told them that licking sugar is bad but they can figure that out through their intuition that what they are doing is not good and they have to protect themselves from the reaction of the person asking or the consequences of being found out to be licking the sugar through lying
Of course, the tone used can have an impact on the response as a tougher tone would spell out a punishment waiting to happen thus the kid lying
2. To cover up an already existing lie
This is the biggest reason why some people are always lying all the time. You tell one lie and you would have to cover it up with another lie because if you risk telling the truth, you would certainly be giving yourself out
3. You won’t handle the truth at the moment
This would be lying for a good reason. Usually done by doctors in a case where the patient may not be able to recover and in that instance, it’s better to keep your spirit high through lying as they try there level best.
Some people have heart-related problems and how to announce bad news to them may be hard thus the need to lie to them in the meantime.
Even single parent do this to protect their kids for instance if the child is a result of a one night stand it would not be good to tell the child you don’t know their father
Or if a parent got pregnant through rape, at times the mother would be forced to lie until they feel you can be told the truth and you can handle it
4. People are afraid of your reaction if they tell the truth
We all know how some people react when we tell them something bad. Some wives know how they would be physically abused if the husband found out they did something wrong
In such instances of domestic violence, you would be forced to lie because of the possible consequences of telling the truth
The reaction may be towards you or against themselves after finding out the truth like A lover might not tell you that they want to move on and end the relationship
It could be because they are very uncertain about your reaction on knowing that they want to end the relationship and in this instance, they believe it will be a negative one thus they end up lying to you
5. People lie because they fear you
If someone cannot be honest or open with you, then they would definitely have to lie and bear putting up with you. The could be a result of your reaction towards them which would be negative
Some people confuse respect with fear because the actions of a person that fears you and respects you are always the same
6. It is courtesy
How do you tell your mom that she’s poor at cooking and her food doesn’t taste nice?
Or how do you even tell your friend she cannot sing or he sucks at standup comedy
It’s in such instances that people lie because they don’t know how to tell you the truth and you take as an honest answer or constructive criticism
In most instances when you tell someone the truth they think you are hating on them or you don’t wish them well or you are jealous
7. It is one way to motivate someone and encourage them
Lying to someone that they are good at something whilst they are not, this can make someone work hard because they believe they are good even if they are not but just because you told them they are hence believing in themselves
Even telling someone that they are not good at something much as they are could motivate them to work hard either to get better at it because you told them they were not good enough or to prove you wrong
This kind of motivation has a problem that it works for some people well as it does not work for others, for instance lying to someone that they are good when they are not might instead make them relax instead of working hard
While others telling them that they are not good, instead of working to getting better they just lose the morale and energy to try on because they now believe they are not good enough for it
So you would have to know what kind of motivation suits which person assuming you are doing it in good spirit because someone might lie to you that you are not good just psychologically affect you and kill your morale. Literally, this is would be termed as psychological warfare
8. To achieve something
Be it earning a job, winning the heart of a lover or getting that political position
The truth may not get you any of these and if you could lie to your love interest that you are single then you could win her heart or if you could lie, potential voters, what you would do for them then you could win an election
how do you stop lying
If you look at most reasons above as to why people lie it is because of selfish interests and the way to stop lying putting your selfishness aside. Be empathic and considerate
That’s all about why people lie and hopefully, you can do something about it that makes you or another a better person